How novel Coronavirus (COVID-19)
might impact your planned wedding is a hot topic
at the moment. Initially, the concern was about
the supply chain for wedding dresses and other
wedding-related items. Then travel bans on people
flying in from a handful of affected countries
became the issue, and now the potential for
government lock-downs or bans on gatherings are
being discussed.
So, should you be concerned? Or, in the words of
that wonderful World War II advice,
Alert but
not Alarmed?
In a word, Yes. So now is the time to get out your
contracts with your various wedding service
suppliers together with your Plan B and look at
those with Coronavirus in mind, to consider the
extent to which infection control measures can be
applied to your current plans, and to come up with
some alternative plans for worst case scenarios.
1. Contract Terms and
Conditions
out
If your contract for a date-dependent service,
such as venue, photographer, videographer,
stylist, hair and makeup, or celebrant, does not
include a cost-free option to postpone or
reschedule (mine does), contact the supplier
concerned and discuss how they would respond to
the need to postpone in response to a government
ban, or other Coronavirus-related change, such as
downsizing. Make sure you get any changes to terms
and conditions in writing.
2. The Legal Situation
out
As long as the two of you, your two witnesses, and
your celebrant are all physically present in the
same space there would be no legal issue with
- wearing surgical masks - as long as everyone
present is confident as to your identity
- not holding hands or kissing - neither is a
legal requirement for marriage in Australia
- not exchanging rings - not a legal
requirement
- standing at a distance from each other - as
long as we can all hear each other (it is
legal to shout!) you can stand metres apart.
IF you have planned to have a destination
wedding in Australia but your plans have been
disrupted for whatever reason, your celebrant
can transfer your Notice of Intended Marriage to
another celebrant in a different location,
regardless of how close to the date of your
wedding the change needs to be made.
If you have planned to get married overseas,
and your plans have been disrupted but you still
want to be married on the same date and that
date is less than a month away, there is a
provision for Shortening of Time to be granted
because of "wedding arrangements". While that
usually means you went ahead and organised your
wedding in Australia without giving the proper
notice, I would be confident in making
representations to the authorities where your
plans have been disrupted by Australian
government actions or advice.
3. Things you might want
to eliminate from your ceremony
out
There are some rituals and practices you might
want to eliminate from your ceremony in the
interest of hygiene/infection control
- Warming of the Rings
This ritual involves passing the rings,
usually in a small organza bag, round the
guests so each can hold and bless them.
Considering the ritual from the point of view
of infection control, this means that multiple
people will be touching the rings before they
get to you.
- Wine or Loving Cup rituals
These involve the two of you drinking from the
same glass or cup, something infection control
specialists have warned against
- Kissing or shaking hands
It is very common for the groom to shake
the hand of the bride's father after he walks
her down the aisle, and to kiss the bride's
mother if both parents do. And, of course,
there is the iconic kiss after you have been
pronounced married. You may want to
forgo these practices, but that doesn't mean
you can't substitute something that is both
fun and photo-worthy. For example, people have
been tapping one another with their feet or
bumping elbows, and I've noticed that
footage of Prince Charles meeting people
reveals that he has replaced
the traditional handshake with an
Indian-style namaste, pressing his palms
together and bowing slightly.
- Holding the microphone while you say your
vows
It is common practice for the celebrant to
hand the wireless microphone to the couple so
each can hold it as they read their vows. This
microphone may have previously been held and
touched by readers, the celebrant, and/or
others.
- Guests being asked to formally greet one
another during the ceremony
In religious ceremonies this practice might be
referred to as Passing the Peace.
- Guests being asked to loudly express
their commitment to support your marriage
Shouting or talking loudly does expel
droplets (we've all had experience of that
person who spits while they talk!). Substitute
Deaf Applause, everyone holding up both
hands and twisting them back and forwards -
makes for great photos!
4. Adjust the physical
layout for your ceremony
out
If at all possible, make the aisle a lot wider,
and set the chairs farther apart. You may have to
reduce guests numbers to achieve this, or move
your ceremony to an outdoors location if you had
planned to have it indoors.
5. Provide hand
sanitising stations
out
Where possible. Given the current shortage, this
might be a problem, but substituting hand washing
stations isn't practical because the choice would
be installing extra plumbing, or having guests
reuse water in basins.
6. Ditch the receiving
line
out
While the formal receiving line is not
particularly common in Australian weddings - the
couple and their parents standing in a line so
guests can file past shaking hands or
hugging/kissing, the alternative, guests
congratulating the couple immediately after the
ceremony with lots of hugs and kisses, shares the
same issues when you are attempting to limit the
possibility of infection transmission. As a
celebrant I'm more than happy to make
announcements about elbow bumps if you wish!
7. Livestream
out
Have your guests attend virtually rather than in
person. While they'll miss out on the food and
drinks, they'll be able to be "present" for the
ceremony.
8. Consider postponing
out
While it is usual, there is no rule about having
the ceremony and your reception on the same day.
So you could go ahead with the ceremony but
postpone the reception til a later date. Or you
could postpone the whole thing.
BUT
don't make any important decisions based only on
the news or without talking to your wedding
service suppliers. Base your decisions on
up-to-date and reliable facts.
If you do decide to postpone or to change your
plans in any way, make sure that your tell your
guests immediately. And don't forget your
celebrant and other important wedding service
suppliers.
9. Don't be ageist!
out
I have seen some suggestions, flowing from the
information emerging that older people, together
with those with underlying medical conditions that
tend to be more prevalent in older people, are
more at risk from the virus, that couples should
be considerate of older family members by making
it clear that they are not expected to attend. If
your relationship with loved ones is more
important than your friends or than your wedding
taking place on a certain day (and I would hope it
would be) this is very bad advice. Rather reduce
the number of overall guests so that close family
members, of whatever age, can attend.
10. Take care of
yourselves
out
There is no shortage of good self-care advice
available. You can't turn on the TV, log into
Facebook, or read online news media without being
bombarded with advice about
- how to wash your hands and wrists properly
using soap and water (20-30 seconds of Happy
Birthday, Bee-Gees Staying Alive, or any one
of dozens of popular songs that take that long
to sing)
- not touching your face
- using tissues or hand-towel to touch things
that others have touched, particularly in
public places
- using hand sanitiser (minimum 70% alcohol)
where hand washing is impractical
- keeping your distance from others
- keeping hydrated
- taking care of underlying health issues
- having the flu vaccine when it becomes
available
It might be prudent to ask your celebrant what
measures they have in place for sanitising pens,
microphones and other equipment.
So take care of yourselves. Make the best
decisions for you and your guests. And enjoy
your wedding, whenever it happens.
Thanks for reading!