Tuesday night (9 January 2018) sees the first episode of
Marry Me, Marry My Family
, a TV program that,
over three weeks, follows six couples as they try to
straddle the gulf between cultures and the gap between
their parents' expectations and their own dreams.
If you are an intercultural couple, how do you navigate
your ceremony? It is not uncommon to have two
ceremonies, a legal one (often the "Australian"
ceremony) and a non-legal ceremony traditional to the
other culture. And for many people that suits
them. It is simple, it is straight-forward. Everyone
knows what to expect. That is, everyone from each
culture knows what to expect from the ceremony that
reflects their culture.
But there is a third option - a fusion wedding ceremony
that incorporates the traditions of what are important
to you both. Once you start listing those things it
starts to become clear how many traditions have
similarities that can be highlighted. Because that's the
reason you are marrying - you met, you recognised
similar values, a common humanity, and fell in love.
What better way to celebrate than by showcasing the ways
in which your cultures intersect.
- Is one culture known for a particular musical
instrument or style of music? Walk down the
aisle to the skirl of the bagpipes, the sound of the
sitar, a brass band, steel drums, or a
- Have your processional lead by a fiddle player,
someone playing a piano accordion, a guitarist, or a
- Light a candle - and reference not only the Unity
Candle, but the practice of lighting candles in
- Meld the Thai and Lao traditions of tying threads
around the couple's wrists with the Celtic tradition
Discuss family traditions with each family to find out
what is really important to them. Work out compromises
for traditions that happen before and after the
Talk to me about incorporating traditions in the
ceremony - I love the creative potential the union of
two cultures offers.
And PS don't forget the design possibilities of a
stationery suite - invitation, menu, order of service,
etc that visual elements of both cultures offer, and the
food and music at the reception!