on My Blog...

Sauce + Substance + Solid Know How, that's me. And what I write reflects all three. So this blog is a little bit cheeky, sometimes courageous, often informativWedding e, and definitely a window into how I think and feel about the good, the bad, the ugly, and the legal when it comes to weddings and other ceremonies ...

Blog Posts in order of posting (newest first)

3 Reasons why I don't discount my fees

Categories: Wedding Budget |
(26/11/2023)
While discounting of celebrant fees is a sales strategy some use during Black Friday sales and at other times, I do not discount for 3 good reasons. Discounting is discriminatory, manipulative, and can contribute to blowing your wedding budget.... More ...

RED at a wedding - the hill I'm prepared to die on

Categories:  | Wedding Attire |
20/11//2023
Don't wear white to a wedding has been shorthand for Don't upstage the bride since before wedding photos got colourful. It's time to consider modern technology and add RED to the list on no-go colours for guests and the celebrant! More ...

Where does your NOIM (Notice of Intended Marriage) go?

Categories: Celebrant | Wedding Legals |
(13/10/2023)
What does "lodged" mean and what happens to your NOIM (Notice of Intended Marriage) once you have handed it over to your celebrant?  More ...

What if your celebrant "forgets" to register your marriage?

Categories:  | Wedding Legals |
10/10/2023
Your celebrant is required to submit your marriage details for registration of your marriage within 14 days of your marriage. If they fail to do that, you are still married. But it might take some effort  to have your marriage registered.... More...

Celebrate and Include Your Grandfathers in Your Wedding Ceremony
Categories: | Inclusive Weddings | Wedding Ceremony |
(03/09/2023)
There are so many ways to include your grandfathers in your ceremony.  More ...

Is it OK for a guest to wear black to a wedding?
Categories:  | Wedding Attire  |  Wedding Traditions |
(01/09/2023)
The belief still persists that it is inappropriate for a (female) guest to wear black to a wedding. But where did this belief come from, and is it still relevant at a time where it is increasingly common for the bridesmaids to be wearing black and some brides wear black too  More ...

Why it is Lawful Wedded, not Lawfully Wedded?
Categories:  |  Vows |
22/08/2023
There is a huge legal difference between taking one another as your Lawful Wedded spouse compared to saying Lawfully Wedded spouse. Which is why you mustn't change that one word when you say your legal vows ... More ...

Surprise Vows
Categories:  |  Vows |
10/08/2023
Surprise vows are personal promises that you each keep secret from the other until you  hear them on your wedding day ... More ...

Saying 'I Do' Without Overdoing It: Introvert's Guide to Planning a Joyful Big Wedding
Categories:  | Inclusive Weddings  |  Wedding Ceremony  |  Wedding Planning|
21/07/2023
You can have a big joyful wedding when you're an introvert, but you need to know what sort of introvert you are, lean into your strengths, know your limits and plan around them. More ...

Proposal Vows: How to Make your Proposal Unforgettable
Categories:  |  Proposing  |  Vows  |  Wedding Traditions  |
20/07/2023
Proposing with a pretty speech is not enough. Announcing a new service - I write your Proposal Vows, inclusive of your Proposal Speech... More...

Finding the Balance: How to Incorporate Humour into Your Vows Without Going Too Far
Categories:  |  Vows |
01/07/2023
A touch of humour in your vows can work brilliantly. But it can also fall flat if you fail approach it with extreme caution because success requires accurately reading your audience and striking  the right balance between love and levity    More...

The Benefits of Staying Low-Tech for Your Wedding Ceremony
Categories:  |  Wedding Legals  |  Wedding Planning  |
13/05/2023
Using devices for signing marriage certificates and reading the ceremony can offer several benefits. However, there are also some drawbacks. These drawbacks, in my view, not only outweigh the assumed or perceived environmental benefits, they include compromising a significant emotional element.   More ...

3 Good reasons to wear pearls to a wedding
Categories:  | Wedding Attire |
22/05/2023
There are a number of excellent reasons for a guest, the marrying couple, the wedding party, and the celebrant to wear pearls at a wedding  More ...

The Traditional Wedding Vows
Categories:  |  Vows  | Wedding Legals  |
09/05/2023
The traditional wedding vows have stood the test of time, are a model for the legal vows, and serve as a template for your personalised vows   More ...

The Legal Vows - A Must Do Requirement with Leeway for Personal Choice
Categories:  | Vows | Wedding Legals |
01/05/2023
To be legally married in a secular civil ceremony in Australia you just say the legal vows because those words create your marriage. Surprisingly, you have some choice over how you will personalise this statement  More...

Pros and Cons of Destination Weddings
Categories:  | Wedding Planning|
29/04/2023
While there are significant legal and logistical issues to consider, and a destination wedding can be expensive and inconvenient for guests, it can also be more consolidated and fun for your wedding party. Destination weddings are a great way to sidestep  pressure to adhere to traditional wedding customs and practices, and to spread cultural awareness and appreciation.  More...

Never Validly Married? What does that mean?
Categories:  | Wedding Legals |
25/04/2023
In Australia, in order for any previous marriage to be recognised by the Government, it has to have been a valid marriage. That means it has to have met all the legal requirements. But that may not be as simple as it sounds... More...

Too Shy to Say Personal Vows? Or Not Allowed To?
Categories:  | Vows | Wedding Ceremony |
09/04/2023
How do you work around knowing you won't be comfortable speaking personal promises on the day or you are marrying in a religious ceremony that does not allow for personal promises? ... More...

What's the Deal with "Solemnise" your Marriage?
Categories:  | Wedding Legals |
04/04/2023
In Australia we talk about solemnising your marriage, rather than marrying you. What's the deal with that? Is there a difference?... More...

Ninja Vows: The Pros and Cons of Writing Each Other's Vows
Categories:  |  Vows  |
23/03/2023
Ninja Vows, a trend where each partner writes the other's vows and the first time they see
the vows or get any idea of what they are expected to promise will be during the wedding ceremony when they are handed the vows andinstructed to read them aloud ... More...

Copyright - It's Economic
Categories: Published Article   |
10/03/2023
Moral rights are the right of an author or creator of a "work" to be acknowledged. It is a right that is related to copyright, but, unlike copyright can't be sold or transferred. Moral rights are therefore relevant to celebrants and to the ceremonies they create. Repost of my article originally published in The Celebrant, Issue 8, June 2021., pp 14-23 Issue 8, June 2021, pp 8-13 ... More...

Moral Rights - It's Personal
Categories: Published Article   |
09/03/2023
Moral rights are the right of an author or creator of a "work" to be acknowledged. It is a right that is related to copyright, but, unlike copyright can't be sold or transferred. Moral rights are therefore relevant to celebrants and to the ceremonies they create . Repost of my article originally published in The Celebrant, Issue 8, June 2021, pp 8-13 ... More...

Consent, Celebrants and the 'Real Estate Factor'
Categories: Published Article   | Wedding Ceremony |
02/03/2023
In this article I discuss the ethical and legal responsibility of celebrants to couples as consumers of celebrant services and how this relates to consent around branding and marketing. Repost of my article originally published in The Celebrant, Issue 13, September 2022, pp 20-31
Facebook and Instagram posts by the Editor, Veronika Robinson, said this about this article: "An Absolute must-read article for any celebrant who claims to create ceremonies based on the client's beliefs." ... More...

The Power of the Subliminal: Celebrant-Led Ceremonies and Cultural Bias
Categories: Published Article   | Wedding Ceremony | Inclusive Weddings
(12/01/2023)
Wedding ceremonies are culturally loaded events influenced by Class Culture, Christian Culture, Consumer Culture, and Celebrity Culture. This is equally relevant to marrying couples and to anyone involved in the wedding industry. Repost of my article originally published  in The Celebrant, Issue 12, June 2022, pp 6-17 ... More...

Navigating Religion as a Civil Celebrant
Categories: Published Article   | Wedding Ceremony
(26/12/2022)
What is consent? And how does Real Consent, Informed Consent, and Intimate Consent apply to celebrant-led wedding ceremonies? Repost of my article originally published  in The Celebrant, Issue 12, June 2022, pp 52-61 ... More...

Consent, Ceremonies, and Celebrants
Categories: Published Article   | Celebrant |Wedding Legals
(24/12/2022)
What is consent? And how does Real Consent, Informed Consent, and Intimate Consent apply to celebrant-led wedding ceremonies? Repost of my article originally published  in The   Celebrant, Issue 10, December 2021, pp 59-68 ... More

Measuring Celebrant Performance
Categories:   | Published Article |  Celebrant |
(06/12/2022)
Pros and pitfalls of various methods of measuring celebrant performance. Repost of my article originally published as Do You Like Me? How Much Do You Like Me? in The Celebrant, Issue 6, December 2020, pp 14-23 ... More

Slips of the Lip, Inclusion, and Extremist Codespeak
Categories:   | Published Article |  Inclusive Weddings |
(28/11/2022)
Lessons from the extremist speak communication playbook. Repost of my article published in The Celebrant,   Issue 5, September 2020, pp 26-27. ... More

Setting Celebrant Fees in a Regulated Environment
Categories:   | Published Article |  Celebrant | Wedding Budget  |
(25/11/2022)
Celebrant fees need to cover multiple expenses, some of them regulated, but how celebrants set their fees and what they charge is unregulated. Repost (with additional material) of my article published in The Celebrant,   Issue 7, March 2021, pp 68-78 ... More

Ceremony Buddies: An Essential Resource for an Inclusive Ceremony
Categories:   | Published Article |   Inclusive Weddings  |
(23/11/2022)
Ceremony Buddies ensure that guests with special needs are included in the wedding ceremony and feel comfortable. Repost of my article published in The Celebrant,  Issue 3, March 2020, pp 83-85 ... More

Coffee Unity Ceremony
Categories:   | Published Article |   Wedding Rituals
(21/11/2022)
A detailed how-to article giving directions and advice about how to include this original ritual. Repost of my article published in The Celebrant,  Issue 4, June 2020, pp 70-77 ... More

What your celebrant says in your wedding - law and custom
Categories:   | Celebrant  |  Wedding Ceremony |  Wedding Legals  |
(12/11/2022)
The Marriage Act requires your celebrant to say only one thing in your wedding. Other people can speak and lead parts of the ceremony.  More

One, Two, and Three Word Vows
Categories:  |  Vows  |
(17/09/2022)
There is no accepted average word length for personal vows, so if you are anxious about public speaking but would still like to make a personal promise you can keep it very short. One, two, or three words can be powerful ...  More

10 Things to leave out of your wedding vows
Categories:  |  Vows  |
(15/09/2022)
There are 10 things that have no place in your wedding vows. Keep you vows romantic, beautiful, and heart-warming by avoiding these negatives...  More

4 Top Reasons to Use a Vow-Writing Service
Categories:  |  Vows  |
(13/09/2022)
Getting help to write your vows is not cheating. It is a good move that will ensure your vows say exactly what is in your heart ...  More

4 ways your choice of celebrant can make or break your wedding photos
Categories:  |  Celebrant   |  Wedding Ceremony  |
(01/09/2022)
There 4 surprising and not-so-surprising ways that who you choose as your celebrant can have a positive or negative impact on how well your wedding photos turn out ...  More


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